Posted by: Andrew Skelton | 11/11/2011

Bigmouth Strikes Again (and won’t shut up!)

You know that I really love big cats (actually, we’re really only just good friends, such is unrequited love) but when it came to blog time I just wasn’t happy posting an image of tigers (in the rain)* on here, Dear Reader, that would not be worthy of your perusal (actually I’m hoping for a book deal from this blog.. but you keep believing it’s all just for you). The tiger photos posted today were taken mid-afternoon, during my Dartmoor Zoo trip, when I was the only one mad enough (I’m still waiting for my certificate**) to be out in the pouring rain, hoping against hope (isn’t that a daft statement, surely it’s hoping with hope – doesn’t the other cancel itself out?) that the clouds would part, and a heavenly choir would herald the glorious afternoon sun (“Deluded”, Ed.) allowing me to photograph these magnificent big cats. Did it? Did it hell… I got soaked, the cats got soaked, my camera and lens got soaked, even my camera bag was soaked on the outside.

Hmmph*** Can you tell I really don’t like this grey and dismal weather? I just had to post something sunnier to Flickr, a bit like an acid to neutralise an alkalie, or matter to balance out anti-matter… or a genuinely talented band to counteract all the dross on these “talent” shows. Today’s image is from 2003, not that that was the last time we had any good weather in the UK, far from it – we’ve had an incredibly dry year this year (I haven’t had a drink since 5pm) with many of the local ponds resembling meteor craters as opposed to lush green oasis (you’re my wonderwall).

Oh dear, can you tell it’s Friday? Yes? Can you tell I’ve been sitting in front of a computer screen for over 9 hours again? It’s time to smash the glass on the emergency box housing a camera in case of emergencies… in this weather it’s time to break out the flash gun as well to create a strong keylight…. Flash, I love you, but we only have 14 hours to save the Earth#

* ’80s New Romantic band, Tigers In The Rain, split up in the early ’90s. Dropped by their major label they had a minor resurgence when one of their early singles was featured on a Jeans Advert. The lead singer, Jimmy Tiger, has subsequently forged out a career on shopping channels where he is the hands that demonstrate and point during camera close ups****
**At least that’s what I thought I was due when the people in white coats said I should be certified (they do have a lovely soft and comfy white van, very plush… it’s got padding on the walls, floor AND roof you know).

*** No, it’s not a reference (for once) to the late great jazz impresario and presenter of my favourite Radio 4 programme “I’m Sorry I Haven’t A Clue“, Humphrey Lyttelton

**** This is, of course, complete rubbish*****
***** “Like the rest of the blog then, Ed.”
# C’mon, admit it, you’re all saying the phrase “Gordon’s alive?” in the deep rich tones of Brian Blessed aren’t you.. well, I know I am.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s


%d bloggers like this: